The Regents Cower and Tremble Before Andrew Cuomo

I confess I did not call or email one single New York State Regent and ask them to vote correctly on the APPR. It's not that I don't think they should vote to count test scores as 50% of a teacher's evaluation. It's not that I think we will be more accurately observed by an "outside observer." I know both of those things are such complete and utter bullshit that there's no way anyone with half the brains God gave them needs to do any deep thinking on either of them. As Carl likes to say of his Superintendent candidates "it's a no brainer."

Nor do I think any of the Regents rented out a hyperbaric chamber and gorged themselves on fish oil, walnuts, blueberries and other brain foods to give them the thinky edge they'd need to excogitate this one through and get it right "for the children." And I really doubt any of them laid in bed grimacing and checking the alarm clock hitting the reset on the Darren Marks sleep app over and over until their cock crowed. I really don't think there was much angst or self reflection involved in this one at all friends.

For all of his happy hot air and heartfelt horseshit Regent Tilles did exactly as I predicted he would and voted like a coward with corporate privatizers. So did all the rest of the gutless, nutless eunuchs from around the state. I'm not sure how this figures into the mix but not one of the male Regents had the stones to stand up to Gubner Andy. They all caved and did as they feared they'd better do. And I'm sure they were all ready to squeak their rationalizations just as the jelly belly heavy hearts legislators did after they were threatened with a Working Families Party styled date rape by Cuomo's goons if they failed to grovel and go along.

Once again the supposedly weakened Governor we keep hearing is just a bad haircut away from Preet Bharara's pin the tail on the donkey dart has managed to get every single outrageous demand from a body of supposed adults who were largely too afraid of him to tell him no. I laugh every time someone else tells me Cuomo's weeks away from an indictment. Or they're teaching Kathy Hochul the secret handshake and they gave her the key to the cookie cabinet in the big office. Whatever. I'll Preet-lieve it when it Preet-pens. In the meantime I'll continue to look on in stunned horror as hordes of public servants refuse to serve the public. I'll continue to shake my head and listen to the rattle as these bought off chickenshits who were supposed to represent New Yorkers and the children of our state continue to tremble and cower and hide from their duties because they are afraid doing their job might mean no limo ride or a seat in the overflow room at Andy's next birthday party. Their priorities are not our priorities. Not even close.

I didn't call or email any of them because I just don't think there's any chance hearing from me is going to change any of their minds. These people didn't decide how they'd vote with children or teachers or parents in mind. We are the furthest thing from any of their imaginations. Just like the trembling heavy hearts legislators who aww shucksed  and gee wizzed their vote as they licked Cuomo's boot --  the idea that any of them is in Albany to serve the unwashed public couldn't be any more ridiculous. The public can fuck off. That's the message they sent me when they passed their budget and it's the same one the Regents reiterated today. Fuck off, New York.

I'd love to tell you about the silver lining I've discovered. I'd love to tell you Hey, but here's the good news... Maybe if you've done too much acid or haven't done quite enough you can take heart in NYSUT's baffling post about this being a good beginning or whatever the hell they're calling it. I anticipate Punchy Mike Mulgrew will be calling on Karen McWho to join him in yet another victory lap if he hasn't done so already. I'm never sure exactly what Mulgrew runs his victory laps around but in this case it's fairly safe to say he can run it around the profession of teaching in New York State.

Thanks to @lacetothetop I stole their graphic.